Lost Count..

today i have lost count of how many times she came to my mind.. each time i think of her smile, i secretly smile to myself, and this has got to be worth something. though it's still painful, the assurance of her well-being seems to nullify the pain. i wish i could say all these to her but it'll only make her uncomfortable. i thought about writing her a letter, but the slightest risk of increasing her anxiety just stops me totally. i can only watch over her at a distance from now.