Dramatic Movie..

what a weird movie outing i had yesterday night. of all the people in the world, i had to bump into my ex-girlfriend. i thought i would never see her again. sigh.. God.. why? i guess i will never know what was the purpose of that meeting and i don't really wish to know. to top it all, she was with her NEW bf. no, please don't be mistaken. i'm not jealous at all. i'm glad she managed to move on and forget about me. please go on without me. i'll be most happy. i'm just pondering why am i still drowning in this guilt trip while she has moved on? whatever happened to the "i may not ever find another guy again because of you"? and the "i'll never forget you"? lol. i find this hilariously ironic. but i would still punch myself in the face and tell myself it's my mistake yet again to have believed yet another girl. what must it take for me to learn not to believe the noble words of the glorious species of irony? well, i already knew she has moved on about 6 months back and got together with him. i just didn't want to say anything but seeing her before my eyes hugging another guy was a tad difficult to swallow.

i always like to put myself through the rough edges. i'm not one who would give myself little pats on the back to make myself feel better. i prefer to go through the 18 levels of hell and come back up, emerging stronger, smarter and better than before. i tend to take all responsibilities and usually they are bad. when something good happens, i put it as the kind acts of others and not myself. no, i'm no angel. please do not misinterpret my writings again. just my minute effort of staying humble. and while something bad happens, i would slap myself and wonder why i would let anything like that happen in the first place. it's illogical to me but i still do it. i say illogical because how does one actually make another person put him on a guilt trip and then suck out all forms of sympathy and then go on to greener pastures, leaving the former bellowing in pain and guilt? do i have the ability to do that? i'm appalled. nevertheless, life still goes on.

there. i've finally let everything out. i feel much better now. it's over and i should be looking into the future. :) thank God i still have mambo. and to think i nearly gave up mambo for her. sheesh.. lol.

all's mambo that ends well.. :)